Kobe Bryant doesn't just play pianos. He makes them. Or so it would appear from the opening scenes of this new ad from Wieden + Kennedy pitching "The Kobe Piano," from which "every note [is] a comedy and tragedy that would make Shakespeare laugh and weep. It will turn piano boys into piano men. It will make Lionel Richie's tears cry tears." Turns out it's an elaborate metaphor for a line of shoes designed by Bryant for Foot Locker and Nike. The collection, the ad informs us, is the "grandest grand collection of grand collections." And yes, Richie himself makes a cameo—adding to his own commercial lore in the process. While the voiceover copy is a bit Old Spicey, the ad blends the winking melodrama of "The Man Your Man Could Smell Like" with a healthy heaping of mock pretension, à la Bryan Cranston selling an iPad, and a dash of good old-fashioned Ron Swanson style woodworking. It has the obligatory sports-stats reference. It's beautifully shot and well paced, and entertaining enough. It makes its point, however circuitously, that the product is like a finely crafted instrument. A second spot, meanwhile, likens the collection to the invention of a better, stronger lightbulb—complete with a shattering sledgehammer and the ability to make even Judah Friedlander look dapper. Sorry, ladies. It's just another metaphor for sneakers. Credits below. CREDITS Clients: Nike and Foot Locker Campaign: "Made by Kobe" Agency: Wieden + Kennedy, Portland, Ore. Creative Directors: Don Shelford, Rob Thompson Copywriter: Adam Noel Art Director: Jon Kubik Producer: Shannon Worley Executive Agency Producer: Matt Hunnicutt Account Team: Jordan Muse, Heather Morba Executive Creative Directors: Mark Fitzloff, Susan Hoffman, Joe Staples Production Company: Traktor Towers Director: Traktor Executive Producer: Rani Melendez Line Producer: Rani Melendez Director of Photography: Bojan Bozelli Editing Company: Stitch Editorial Editor: Andy McGraw Assistant Editor: Alex Tedesco Post Producer: Chris Girard Post Executive Producer: Juliet Batter Visual Effects Company: The Mill Visual Effects Executive Producer: LaRue Anderson Flame Artists: James Allen, Glyn Tebbutt Visual Effects Producers: Dan Roberts, Antonio Hardy Titles, Graphics: Justin Morris Music, Sound Company: Beacon Street Studios Composers: John Nau, Andrew Feltenstein Sound Designer: Mike Franklin Songs: "Out of the Woods" ("Piano"), "The Wunder r3" ("Lightbulb") Executive Producer: Leslie Dillullo Mix Company: Beacon Street Studios Mixer: Mike Franklin Assistant Engineer: Dewey Thomas Producer: Caitlin Rocklin